Father O’Malley’s Picks of the Week! – Week 12

By: Father O’Malley

A Friend of the Clergy

Father O’Malley has been “under the weather” this past week and was only able to give us the cliff notes versions of his picks. Father O thinks that he may have either H1N1 or the clap, either way he’ll get some penicillin and be ready to go on Monday!

Week 12 Picks

Game 1

Ohio State vs. Michigan (12:00PM Kickoff), Ann Arbor, MI

Father O says: If Ohio State chokes and loses to Michigan for the first time since 2003, they don’t deserve the Rose Bowl, they deserve the Clorox Toilet Cleaner Bowl! Ohio State is going to Make Michigan their Bichigan! Sounds like a score shirt! Ohio State wins 30-10.

Game 2

Chattanooga vs. Alabama (12:20 PM Kickoff), Tuscaloosa, AL

Father O says: What the hell is Alabama doing playing Chattanooga this late in the season? Seriously, I expect this out of a Big Ten team, but Alabama? This must have been scheduled when Mike Shula was the head coach… Anyways, Alabama runs the train on well, the Trains. Alabama 42-13.

Game 3

FIU vs. Florida (12:30PM Kickoff), Gainesville, FL

Father O says: FIU, isn’t that some sort of sexually transmitted disease? What the hell is wrong with the SEC? Alabama is playing a bunch of trains and Florida is messing around with STDs? Seriously, what the hell is wrong with this world? Florida vaccinates and defeats the evil FIU. Florida 42-10.

Game 4

Cal vs. Stanford (7:30PM Kickoff), Stanford, CA

Father O says: THE BAND IS ON THE FIELD, THE BAND IS ON THE FIELD! Sorry, just a little flashback… Stanford is the hottest team in the nation right now! After making USC look like a high school team last week, this team is capable of anything. Cal is going to have a rough time… Stanford rolls on! Stanford 35-20.

Game 5

Kansas vs. Texas (8:00PM Kickoff), Austin, TX

Father O says: UPSET SPECIAL OF THE WEEK! Texas is going to lose to Kansas for one reason and one reason only. Mark Mangino started fasting for Thanksgiving 3 days ago. By the time kickoff rolls around Mangino hasn’t eaten in 124 hours and will eliminate anything in his path! Kansas upsets Texas. Kansas 13-10.

Check back on Monday to see if Father O’Malley survives his H1N1/Syphallis outbreak!